Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Love Matters ~ A Sonnet

Love Matters ~ A Sonnet

In dreams of eyes so raven blacked, with lips
Too mad to taste such sweetness as prevails
In sleep, he makes a feint to quell but rips
Instead the hold of summer love regaled.

In him she sees example rare and deems
How night in silence bends a will and binds
No one but she alone, so fair she seems
Too delicate, a maiden and refined.

But he by chance does overhear such joy
As she recounts old love not cold, now near.
In haste, his heart betrayed a dulling toy,
He spends his luck and she, outcast, no tear.

        With strength in love do women hold the hand
        And men, their hand betrayed, lose all command.

© 2011 Maureen E. Doallas
_______________________________

This month, Every Day Poems is exploring sonnets, beginning with this feature by Karen Swallow Prior at TweetSpeakPoetry, which references this podcast on "How to Write a Sonnet". This is my second effort at writing a sonnet; I'll share the first, a "backward" sonnet, in a few days.

You'll want to read also "Glass Slipper Sonnets" by Angela Alaimo O'Donnell, author of Saint Sinatra and Other Poems. It's as complete an explanation of the form as you're likely to find and will leave in your mind images of six-inch heels and maybe the six-foot kind, too.

18 comments:

Glynn said...

That is lovely. And I think Elizabethan.

Irene said...

Splendid writing, Maureen! Your poem made me feel like I went back in time. :-)

Pat Hatt said...

Wonderfully written, does have an older time feel to it. Nicely done!

Brian Miller said...

love has such an effect...yes i have lost my command to it...the opening lines are a great hook...

Louise said...

Beautiful & well written..I find sonnets so difficult to write. You make it look easy...I must have another go sometime.. :)

Tashtoo said...

The form works beautifully with your words...so often they can seem so terribly forced, but this is silken in its flow. Loved and much appreciated!

S. Etole said...

I would like to hear this one read by you ... {smiling at the 6 foot heels comment}

hedgewitch said...

I find most sonnets not much to my taste , but when they work, they reveal why they are such a perfect vehicle for a complex thought, as here. The ending couplet feels like an eternal quote, Shakespearean or otherwise. Thanks also for the links.

Anonymous said...

wow! nice.

Maude Lynn said...

I really enjoyed this!

Anonymous said...

"As she recounts old love not cold, now near."

Beautiful line... and piece

Anna @ waysidewordgarden said...

I am finding the sonnet much more difficult than the sestina! Yours flows so effortlessly here, and I love the ending couplet. I very much enjoyed reading this; lovely!

Beachanny said...

Sonnet, the highest English poetic form to my mind; and crafted here in the best words used the best way. You coupled two ideas I've been pondering lately - personal power, and the best way to write a love poem. You have achieved great heights here, Maureen Kudos!

Thanks for the excellent critique on Musing too. I am pondering that re-write as well.

Louise Gallagher said...

Your sonnet is beautiful!

JAGDISH BALI said...

Great love lore.

Cathy said...

A fine journey back in time

Anonymous said...

I agree with Natasha and Joy, well done!

Anonymous said...

A regal, Elizabethan tone.