Love at first sight
it was
Not
like the romance
Of rain
in my hands
Held
in afternoon light
Taking sides
in a room
Scented
with loss
Three words
drifting back
In the quiet
so fought
© 2010 Maureen E. Doallas. All Rights Reserved.
___________________________________
I wrote this poem for Carry on Tuesday, which each week provides a prompt that participants are to use wholly or partly in an original poem or prose piece.
The prompt for Tuesday, August 17, comes from the first sentence of chapter 1 of Joseph Heller's 1961 best-selling novel Catch-22: It was love at first sight.
To read other Carry on Tuesday contributors' poems or prose for Prompt #66, go here.
Your writing beckons ... always.
ReplyDeleteI love the images here -- the rain, the room, just beautiful.
ReplyDeletethe scent of pink carnations always remind me of loss.
ReplyDeletebeautiful scenery with sadness filled in somehow :D Thank for sharing^^
ReplyDeleteMaureen - this is beautiful! I enjoyed the rhythm of it - very special!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful poem. I liked the flow and your style.
ReplyDeleteSavoring this. Yummy.
ReplyDeleteMushy..sweet love..
ReplyDeletelost in our own world
Hi Maureen-- this is beautiful-- the rain in the hands lines especially appeal to me-- something rare and elusive and "naming it" which to me is to say what something truly is, a love within a hard-won silence...? I love the deceptive simplicity of each stanza and how each contains something of deep import and the impact of the last line...brava! xj
ReplyDeleteA thank you to everyone who has read and commented. The encouragement is much appreciated. ~ M
ReplyDeleteI like everything about this: the short-short stanzas and lines, the title, the way you use the imagery you do. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI love the lilting way your poem reads. Simply beautiful. Thanks so much for contributing to Carry On Tuesday
ReplyDelete"Not
ReplyDeletelike the romance
Of rain
in my hands"
This is my favorite part. Paints such a vivid picture in my mind
I'm loving this poem, Maureen! The impact of each compact line is intense! And the opening is especially compelling: "Love at first sight/it was//not." The "not" resounds so strongly and exemplifies how a poem can turn on a single word. Thanks so much for sharing!
ReplyDelete