James Rainsford
© James Rainsford Used With Permission
Day Breaks Barred
Day breaks barred
light concealing schemes
stenciled dreams
fevered words
cold tongues silencing voices
tendered to spring's swell.
© 2011 Maureen E. Doallas
____________________________I offer this poem, in the Shadorma form comprising six lines of 3-5-3-3-7-5 syllables, respectively, for today's One Shoot Sunday event at One Stop Poetry. You'll find here a selection of five photographs by James Rainsford and instructions for participating in the Picture Prompt Challenge. Poetry and flash fiction may be contributed.
Another of my poems using the Shadorma form is here.
For another One Stop feature with James Rainsford, go here.
For another One Stop feature with James Rainsford, go here.
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14 comments:
Great lines, especially the final one. Your poem makes me think of a failed prison break--in the respect that initial complicity turns cold-tongued and ultimately remaining a dream of escape.
You have chosen your words well, and with delicacy. I like the rhyme you've used just a bit. I like this tension you've created in your tight shadorma.
Thank you! I'm finding I really enjoy using the Shadorma form, which forces focus and conciseness but also allows for deep imagery.
Dustus, yes. I've been thinking a lot about China and the arrests there (as you'll see on Tuesday/Wednesday). There's a bit of that here but I opened it up.
This was a most elusive picture, for being so simple and you seem to have gotten to its very essence with your shadorma, which seems almost a perfect reflection in form of the ideas in the words.
stenciled dreams...
your words always come alive and dance their own jig across my screen.
Blessings.
Loved this Maureen. I could think of nothing for this image and your shadorma realizes it perfectly. Especially loved "stenciled dreams
fevered words" seems to reflect the events across the world today. Excellent shadorma. Thank you so much. Gay
I chose this image too Maureen ~ found it quite alluring in some way ~ loved what you did with it and how those reflections and words mirrored so much more ~ great take ~ Lib ~ @libithina
The words roll around and off the tongue - lovely, Maureen.
not sure if my comment has been "eaten" by blogger...hopefully not...
what a wonderful shadorma for this picture..."day breaks barred" I simply love, as well as your last line.
Your shadorma kung fu is strong! Love the last two lines. This is the first time I've heard of shadorma, so, thank you. Happy writing :)
i like it.
it dances and then gives a bow.
thanks for sharing.
I loved the "stenciled dreams, fevered words" also.."tendered to the springs swell"...the photo reminds me of an opening to a natural spring....lovely...bkm
Once again your economy of words(must be the form of course)halts me to read and read again. Love this. By the way, thanks for the constructive comment the other day...It meant so much. I am looking into getting some help with maturing my writing through Image Magazines On-Line mentoring. Blessings.
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