How Everything Turns
How everything turns
away — the leaf
from the tree,
a whorl readying
for fall's striptease;
the bird
from the nest
the eagle poached,
that single feather,
ruffled, left behind;
the messenger
from the recipient
who knows no good
news comes
with the unmistakable knock
on the door;
the sender
from the letter
read accidentally,
the words he confessed
but claimed he'd not meant;
the face
from the gaze chilled
with the words
spoken with a hand curled in
on its own goodbye.
© 2011 Maureen E. Doallas
My audio recording of the poem:
Audio Recording of How Everything Turns by mdoallas
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
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23 comments:
Lovely poem - and that last line - "a hand curled in on its own goodbye" - beautiful.
I love each of the examples---surprising and interesting choices.
I like the narrative that kind of develops from "the messenger" onward....how we turn toward and away from the people mentioned.
Beautiful Maureen.
Stirred here.
Left praying that I turn toward...
Lovely, sad, poignant - and you have a beautiful reading voice, Maureen.
left wondering about that last line ...
Truly touching.
(P.S. There is an extra "in" in the last line.)
Thank you, Timoteo. The extra "in" is now out. (Fortunately, I didn't say it twice in the audio.)
Beautiful & sad poem..very poignant...I felt touched..
def stirring and a felt sadness as well...maybe goodbyes do that to me...
a melancholy essence of separation, of loss -- moving write Maureen...
I almost hear echos of Rilke here, Maureen, in moving from statement to statement via particulars, i.e. Everything Turns Away makes me think of the poem I just worked with from the Rilke blog about the things that leave us-- and how I felt I needed to counter it. I love the notion of autumn's striptease and again the form you're working in works beautifully. Thanks for your very kind words on my effort for today. xxxj
Love the use of the falls striptease, truly touching write.
"Everything turns away": such sad words. A melancholy, beautiful poem Maureen.
Working from the outer world to the inner, each example rings true and a little closer to home, till the final turning away, shadowed, becomes clear. Fine, spare, dignified, yet filled with an all too human pain.
A hand curled at it's own goodbye...love that image..great work Maureen...bkm
so beautifully written... rich expression and sadness within these examples.
Touching and beautiful !
so touching and so beautiful a good by with a closed hand wonderful image
http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/11/the-day-of-the-dead/#comment-1682
3 Wows here. love this poem.
fall's striptease...this is a tease. love it.
The 'Turn' to away...
so evoking, the empty nest with the single ruffled feather...Loss.
the letter...Loss
evoking sentiment...saddness.
it moves me...your poem has affected me. good job.
Maureen, it made my soul happy to hear your read your beautiful poem. My heart much richer having heard it. You have a beautiful, poetic voice, friend to match your lyrical words.
Really nice..... and thoughtful. I don't like that unmistakeable knock on the door...... Really enjoyed listening to you read this poem!
I really love the autumnal feel of this, and the ghazal quality (wasn't sure if you meant it to be a ghazal) but there was a thread that ran through it, that tied each couplet together and yet each one at the same time changed. Spare, minimal, concise imagery. Great!
These are fine, evocative images of turning away, Maureen. I was especially struck by the messenger turning away after delivering the message, not knowing the impact. It's haunting!
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