Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Signs (Poem)


What he noticed was the small thing:
the only photo of the two of us

gone missing from the place he looked
every morning. It was weeks before

our room, accepting the absence,
took on the chill of emptied space.

He still wants to talk about the weather,
the time it takes for a flash of lightning

to reach the ground and cleave the space
between us. I smile, remembering how

he always goes for atmospherics,
holds his breath till a storm passes.

But why bother with daily forecasts?
We both know it takes no genius to pull

back a curtain and see for ourselves that
gathering clouds don't always nourish rain.

© 2012 Maureen E. Doallas


Kathleen Overby said...

This is a masterfully crafted way to take a reading on emotions, or the lack of emotions. I haven't been visiting all my online friends this summer, but am I glad I saw this on FB and came over. Love and big hugs just sent .

the sad red earth said...

This is plainer speech than I'm accustomed to seeing in your poetry. A new direction? Experimentation? It seems right here. Also, you've managed a defensible use of "gone missing." A double achievement!

S. Etole said...

An impact of emotion about lack of emotion.

Anonymous said...

the chill of emptied space...

Anonymous said...

this is a haunting piece, esp the last line. truly said.

Jessica Lynn Lang said...

Well executed. I like the weather metaphor. I like how you're able to cut to the chase and expose the a deep psychology.

Brian Miller said...

oh dang...there is a little emotion in this one maureen...smiles....nice allusions throughout though...the lightning cleaving...the missing picture....yeah dont take much to figure it out...

Joan Barrett Roberts said...

Maureen, such a powerful write. Your verse, "escape of empty room" --the chill of an emptied space" -- something now missing but not lost!

My favorite verses..
"But out of the way -- perhaps to know it has gone away, that love we shared and now gone."


"back a curtain and see for ourselves that gathering clouds don't always nourish rain."

A powerful emotional piece -- the want the need the wish held!

Jenne' R. Andrews said...

Moving and more than poignant, Maureen-- the weather metaphor is terrific, and made new here-- xxxj

Britton Minot said...

Maureen, this speaks to me today-clear, starkly honest, brooding (him), resolved (her).

Louise Gallagher said...

Oh my Maureen. The absence of emotion gives such emotion to this entire poem -- wow!


Beachanny said...

I save your poems to read "inbetween". They are so fresh, like sorbets that cleanse the mind, exact and poetic. I always can find North after reading your work. You write true poetry and when I'm unsure of a definition while reading this widely diverse work, I am reassured here. Again in this poem, you manage to convey emotion in a precise way because your language is so specific, your metaphors so apt.

Victoria said...

You have the skill to evoke deep emotion without "purple prose." Truly impressive, powerful write.

Laura said...

Maureen, I read this in my inbox this morning and have been going back to it all day. Holding my breath as the storms silently pass over--pulling the curtain aside to check the skies. Sometimes your words just name the place so well.This is one of them.

Name: Roberta said...

I love this poem too Maureen! hits at the heart for sure... for some reason some of the song lyrics from an older song by Carly Simon came to my mind when reading your poem (That's the way I've always heard it should be..).."My friends from college they're all married now, they have their houses and their lawns. They have their silent noons, tearful nights, angry dawns. Their children hate them for the things they're not, they hate themselves for what they are, and yet they drink, they laugh, close the wound, hide the scar..." Your poem certainly brings out emotions to me, I agree with all the others comments on it as well... wonderful work!